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1:1: Enter Playoffs: Enter Kingbot
There are a lot of things you don’t know about me, like that I lost my virginity to a girl name Gilda who had a birthmark in the shape of Dom DeLuise masturbating on her left thigh. You didn’t know...
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Kings – Sharks 1:2 – Reset, Renew, Reclaim
I know when I’ve done wrong. I don’t shy away from responsibility. I refuse to let stubbornness disinfect a critical, viral change. Shit needs to change. The Kings, as myself. We all know what went...
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Residual Tantrums
This is a Sharks fan. I got this picture from a friend of mine, who had a friend of his pick him up this shirt during the game last night at SAP Center. This shirt says “BEAT LA”. Beat LA. That...
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1:3 Sharks @ Kings – Turf War
So far this series has not resembled last season’s low-scoring affair between the Kings and Sharks. However, the home ice advantage seems to be intact and tonight the Kings need to see that this one...
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Priorities
I feel somewhat incapable of writing a preview of the Kings-Ducks series. We’ve been waiting for this series to happen for far too long. I’m positively giddy with excitement. This isn’t a “Freeway...
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So We Drink
To an injustice. To self reflection. On self degradation. The Jewish way. We were not beaten. Self flagellation. Last time the series was tied, the Kings won two games. We drink. Filed under: L.A....
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Motive
Yesterday Bobby told you how the Kings need to play to beat the Ducks. I’m here to tell you why they need to beat them. Garbage hockey shouldn’t prosper. I may dislike the Blackhawks for what they have...
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Eat Your Enemy, Take His Power
The Kings drop three to San Jose. Play through the neutral zone, a sharp transition game and a deadly ability to score off the rush sends the Sharks a game away from the second round of the playoffs....
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And Here We Are, Where We’ve Been, Just Like It Wasn’t Like Before
Up 3-1 we were confident, but we cautioned “San Jose was confident up 3-0″. Down 3-1, Chicago gloated, “Detroit was confident up 3-0″. Lots of things have been said. Words are piss. How silly are we to...
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Kings Off To A Start
I’m a pretty happy guy. The Kings are three wins away from a second Stanley Cup in who-gives-a-fuck-how-many years, it’s a second Stanley Cup. I’m a pretty lucky guy. I have been to 14 out of 22...
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Jazz Hands
It was sometime during the third period. The score was tied 2-2 and Anze Kopitar was blazing down the ice, breaking past a defending New York Ranger and crossing the offensive blue line. I yelled, “Be...
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Long Live The Gabitar – 7 More Years of Gaborik
If there is a downside to Marian Gaborik signing a 7 year, $34 million contract today, it is having to hear people say and write “yo gabbo gabbo” like mind numbed six year olds every time he scores....
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Right Feelings & Wrong Things
I sat in the chiropractor’s office this morning and sorted through a bevy of violently thumbed magazines. In the pile, the number “27″ in white on black caught my eye. It was Alec Martinez giving...
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Kings Raise A Banner, Sharks Something Something
Now that the Kings are terrible again we can get back to what we do best: bitching! Ahem, excuse me. I just swallowed down a large mouthful of dust mites and long dead skin cells that rose from my...
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The Kings and I Throw Some Crap At The Wall, Nothing Sticks
Hey. How’s it going? Shitty? Yeah, me too. Two nights. Two losses. The Kings signature stingy defense and cohesive play up the ice is enjoying a nap. “That Decade That Produced Very Little Good Music...
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Willie Mitchell’s Return Signals Who Cares Get A Win
I can’t watch the game tonight. That has been the case for far too many games this season, part of the reason I’ve been mostly MIA. However with Scribe’s hopefully short hiatus I will try to pick up...
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Hurricanes @ Kings, Jack Johnson @ A Soup Kitchen
Don’t have much time to write today… also have virtually nothing to say about the Carolina Hurricanes. Don’t have any real comment on the Kings last game against the Panthers as I never saw it, but it...
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What The Hell Is A Jyrki Jokipakka?
I’m getting sick of playing the Dallas Stars. However they have a new defenseman playing his 5th NHL game tonight who competes for one of the goofiest names in league history. Jyrki Jokipakka. That...
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Dwight Friggin What The Flip King?!
There are many reasons the Kings lost against the Nashville Predators tonight in a shootout but having just finished watching my recording of the game, I am having a hard time remembering anything...
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